In Dear John, this is probably the line that came up the most often. I'll see you soon then. Then there's the bright and penetrating sunlight, so white, so beautiful. It brings a halo around everyone who's bathing in the sunshine. The Scandinavian sun at this time of the year makes you feel nothing but grateful, somehow. Streets are still narrow. People are still relaxed. Shops still close early. I'm not much of the talkative type, specially when I don't pressure myself into talking and socializing. So we were just sitting there, watching people pass by. People pass by and by and by. Like time. Like everything that's slipping away right from our clenched hands.
In Jack Kerouac's On The Road, he wrote, "A pain stabbed my heart, as it did every time I saw a girl I loved who was going the opposite direction in this too-big world". He's damn right. The problem is you don't know you'll love or not. You only feel the pain that goes through you to the deepest of your heart. There was silence. The Swedish language is like the background music played in a movie scene. No one really cares about the meaning or the singer. It just goes on and on. Someone asked me today what I'm doing here. I said, nothing. There must be some sense in doing nothing in a particular place, otherwise there shouldn't be so many people longing for that. I never ask certain questions so that they could stay unanswered. When you don't know something, you don't have to lie about not knowing it. Simple as that. Distance is not a good enough reason for not doing something, you just don't want it that much, not so much that you could crawl all the way from there to here. That's what they sing in the song, right. "For you I would crawl from New York to California." I put on my sunglasses and waited for the traffic light to change. The bus was behind me, as I walked farther and farther away. I never looked back, like every time when I forced myself to look forward with my head held high and not to look back at those moments, stagnant in time, lost and never found again. I saw that sliding door slowly close in front of me, as if demonstrating its life-changing power. You never know. You'll have to wait and see.
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